Christmas is over and I did go home to my mom and dad's. I am so glad that I took the advice of a friend and did not become a bah hum bug. I learned a valuable lesson this year that will stick with me forever. Life is not about me. It is about others. The others I am referring to is my parents. I have found that I may never gain whatever it is I am searching for from them.......approval, or whatever the case may be. But the neat thing is, that I am learning to step out of my own neediness so I can truly love. Love is not about having all my right conditions met, then I will love. It is about not having those conditions and still choosing to love. Love is not prideful. It does not say, "I will love you when you treat me right."
This sort of love is risky because it is a stone cold fact, at some point, I will get hurt. But, I am finding that it is worth the sacrifice. One of my fondest Christmas memories is the yr my dad and I decorated a Grinch gingerbread house together. This was not a childhood memory. I was probably close to 30 that Christmas. But, it is one of the most treasured memories I have of my dad and I. I will never forget it. I have decided that next yr I am not putting up my tree at my house I am taking all my decorations to my parents and decorate their house for Christmas. I only hope that everyone is still in good health for that to happen. Somehow this Christmas was different. I learned a little more about love.
this was such a blessing to read tammy. thank you so much for sharing it. i know that this is not only a decision that will benefit your parents. it's good for the heart to reach out unconditionally and accept the things you have no power to change. i know this will enlarge your soul.
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